Figured I'll show off some tales of mine from playing Far Cry 3. I'll add more later maybe.
(Also, yay, friends list)

Leopards are jerks
I'm roaming about in Far Cry 3 when I come across these two Rakyat warriors (good guys, basically) mourning by a tombstone. Guessing it's a lost loved one or comrade, I give them some space. Then out of nowhere, a fucking leopard comes and pounces on one of the sobbing dudes, startling his buddy who's struggling for his gun. I take out the leopard with a quick burst from my signature assault rifle, saving the survivor. He gets on his feet, walks to the tombstone that now has his former buddy and the dead leopard lying in front of it, gets on his knees, and continues mourning.
The next day, I'm telling a friend over Xbox Live about what had happened to these Rakyat warriors while roving around Far Cry 3 some more. When I finish explaining it to him, I also add in at the end "So yeah, leopards are jerks, bro". I swear, as soon as I finish saying that, a leopard growls behind me and pounces me, making me scream out of terror. After barely getting my self together and fighting the leopard off, I paused the game, my friend asking "What the hell happened?". I exclaimed "A LEOPARD FUCKING HEARD WHAT I SAID...". Of course he dies in laughter, as do the other 2 people that I've told this story so far.
They just don't understand... *shudders*

Dedication
I'm cruising off the coast of one of the islands in a patrol boat, looking for sharks to hunt down with my sniper rifle. As I'm cruising, I pass by two pirates driving a technical, who end up spotting me and whipping around to give chase. They drive on the road next to the beach for a while before eventually off-roading onto the sand. At this point I decide to stop my boat and maybe take a few shots at them. As I stopped, the pirates steered directly towards the ocean and floored it, driving into the ocean water as much as they could until their truck was submerged. They just sat there for a while, chilling in the salt water for a few seconds before eventually exiting their vehicle underwater. They floated to the top and tried to swim, but being the stupid AI they are, they eventually drown.
Just goes to show that the pirates will do whatever it takes to kill me, even if it means endangering their own lives. These guys are hardcore.

The Magician's Jeep
Walking down a road, I hear gunfire in the distance, so I sprint to investigate. Although I was too late, what happened was a fight between Rakyat warriors and some Privateers (mercenaries, basically), with the mercs being the victors. Deciding to deal some payback, I equip the AMR I bought, which is in a nutshell a very loud and powerful sniper rifle that fires explosive rounds. Just peeking over the crest of the hill with a few blades of grass to obscure me, I plan my attack. Two mercs in plain sight standing out of their jeep, no more than 50 meters away from me. Another merc comes around the corner of the jeep, the gunner I presume, making the total count to three. Waiting a second to savor the moment, I aim at the chest of the merc closest to the jeep, and hold my breath. Steady. Wait for it... PISHAAOW! The bullet knocks him back 5 feet! The other two mercs panic. "Sniper fire!" one of them yells, while the other charges down the road to where he heard the shot rang. I readjust my aim, pointing to the charger's head. Almost... KERPLAAOW! Right between the eyes! Makes his dead body do a backflip due to the force of the bullet. One last guy. He's hiding behind the jeep, attempting to take cover. No matter. I aim right at the spot he'd hiding, despite the jeep in the way... PITCHAAOW! It goes right through the vehicle like a hot knife through butter! His body limply flies back from where it hid. Satisfied with my victory, I decide to celebrate in one of the few ways I know how: by destroying their former vehicle. I don't bother with steadying my aim as I unleash a bullet into the smoking jeep. Now the bullet hit it's mark, but something strange happens: instead of the jeep going up in an explosive inferno like usual, it just... vanishes! The metal crunches like it exploded, and the doors fly off to the side, but the jeep itself just disappears! There's not even a hint of an explosion at where the jeep formerly rested, just the bodies of the mercs. While I was baffled at this act of what I can only assume is magic (or a glitch if you're no fun), I was equally pissed off at not being able to witness an explosive victory. So I turn my attention to the former Rakyat technical and blow that up instead with no problem, and now half the hill side is an inferno because of it.
I wonder where that jeep disappeared to...